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January 18th, 2021

{{}} Use Upright for 20m today

10:59 woke up early, at 9 am. slept ~5h. started routine.

feel prone to .

rn feeling and (thus empty) - don’t want to do anything. waiting for Anya to come feed me.

11:24 feel like there is too much going on

15:26 took a nap together, back to being functional again

feel even ready to study (deadline pressure helps aw)

15:45 for studying want to try focus keeper

of works

like the idea of

for those are

paper materials

timers

and for in general

17:29 feel down, . hard to to study.

bc hard to study around

mb bc [[reducing ]] has its effect for sure. plus skipped .

17:51 much better after lunch break: eating w/ TV, , plus 3x

18:22 feel urge to studying, literally like preparing to jump through a

21:52 studied over an hour, proud.

realized that I, again, years thinking I was stupid bc I couldn’t prepare/understand TGI, when in fact I, again, just lacked some basics from first semesters.

I'm not , I was just lacking some foundation, basic understanding, and didn't have good enough teachers/ learning materials.

{{}} schedule free-flow block in the evening

to "chase interests"

letting my mind wonder, guilt free, and follow whatever ideas come to mind

after [[reducing ]] begin to actually feel things again

begin to enjoy music

feel calmer, with more motivation, energy, eagerness for the future

23:55 going to bed earlier. things seem to get better.

Worry that is a wrong one, worry to have chosen prematurely.

She seem to have so little about her going on: so little ambitions, no drive: only doubts, fears, self petty - weakness and laziness, together with entitlement and "just wanting to have fun".

I'm just afraid that it's contagious and that she will pull me down or key me low.

that's why I must spend as much as possible time apart from her.

thus renting a [coworking space]seems like a very good idea after all

Orpheas 🪐 (@orpheaskk) Tweeted: you're not lazy, you just haven't found interest-task fit https://twitter.com/orpheaskk/status/1350509251479937026

Orpheas 🪐 (@orpheaskk) Tweeted: biggest mistake you can make is to have a hot girlfriend before finding interest-task fit https://twitter.com/orpheaskk/status/1350509252775972865

Mary (@morty_lin) Tweeted: @kevinzawadi @orpheaskk I'd say being in a relationship is just v time and attention-consuming, so, usually it ends up with either being distracted from finding the thing you're interested in, or neglecting the relationship. https://twitter.com/morty_lin/status/1350778866604892163

Orpheas 🪐 (@orpheaskk) Tweeted: @kevinzawadi @morty_lin Mary is right BUT I was also just taking the piss out of this meme https://t.co/v8fbXmnBNQ https://twitter.com/orpheaskk/status/1350806778146136073

David Vargas (@dvargas92495) Tweeted: NEW EXTENSION: Mindmaps!

Installing the extension will add a new option to the ... menu on the top right. Clicking the new "Open Mindmap" option will render a mindmap based on your current page's Roam data!

For more information, check out https://t.co/BZTujhMt8Q! https://t.co/eRtOSJIJWx https://twitter.com/dvargas92495/status/1350882265669259266

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January 18th, 2021