MPH

03:18 👀 ❤️ ⭐️ 🔬 without MPH calmly fix things I avoided and get shit done.

17:51 ❤️ much better after lunch break: eating w/ TV, RB, plus 3xMPH

MPH supply and addiction concerns

18:15 low energy but still feel like reading. apart from watching some TV (not so much) don't want to do anything after full lunch and with MPH wearing off

03:31 ❤️ now last MPH is wearing off and feel like falling asleep

two of the MPH wore off - only then i could fall asleep

diary observations without MPH but still couldn’t stop myself from obsessively choosing Apple Watch complications.

starting new routine/activity block is the hardest. taking MPH to power up helps. plus meditation makes it easier. guess it's due to anxiety.

but remember, that one day wasn’t enough to push MPH tolerance down to zero. so you started Monday with some heightened tolerance already.

19:25 👀 ⭐️ ➕ saw multiple MPH pills once again in a poo.

called Dr. Redling, went and got prescription for MPH in advance - 2 days before running out

Went too fast, took too many MPH. hard to stop, but stopped with help of Anya, by talking through my fixations.